3 Ways to Love Your Audience with Carol Cox and Diane Diaz: Podcast Ep. 265
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We’re wrapping up the month of February talking about how we as speakers can love our audiences.
Why is this important?
Because the more connected the people in our audience feel to us and to each other, the more impactful and memorable our presentations and talks will be.
And here’s the thing about loving our audiences: it’s about relationship, which is much different from the standard approach to public speaking which tends to put all of the spotlight on the speaker.
In this episode, which is the audio from our LinkedIn Live show, we share 3 ways you can love your audience.
You can watch the video replay at https://www.linkedin.com/video/event/urn:li:ugcPost:6897210513009569792/
About Us: The Speaking Your Brand podcast is hosted by Carol Cox, joined in this episode by our lead speaking coach Diane Diaz. At Speaking Your Brand, we help women entrepreneurs and professionals clarify their brand message and story, create their signature talks, and develop their thought leadership platforms. Our mission is to get more women in positions of influence and power because it’s through women’s stories, voices, and visibility that we challenge the status quo and change existing systems. Check out our coaching programs at https://www.speakingyourbrand.com.
Links:
Show notes at https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/265
Apply for our Thought Leader Academy: https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/academy/
Schedule a consult call with us to talk about creating your signature talk and thought leadership platform: https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/contact.
Connect on LinkedIn:
- Carol Cox = https://www.linkedin.com/in/carolcox
- Diane Diaz = https://www.linkedin.com/in/dianediaz
Related Podcast Episodes:
265-SYB-Love-Your-Audience.mp3: Audio automatically transcribed by Sonix
265-SYB-Love-Your-Audience.mp3: this mp3 audio file was automatically transcribed by Sonix with the best speech-to-text algorithms. This transcript may contain errors.
Carol Cox:
We’re wrapping up the month of February talking about how you can love your audience as a speaker on this episode of the Speaking Your Brand podcast. More and more women are making an impact by starting businesses running for office and speaking up for what matters. With my background as a TV political analyst, entrepreneur and speaker, I interview and coach purpose driven women to shape their brands, grow their companies and become recognized as influencers in their field. This is Speaking Your Brand, your place to learn how to persuasively communicate your message to your audience. Hi there, and welcome to the Speaking Your Brand podcast. I’m your host, Carol Cox. This episode is the audio from a LinkedIn Live that we did on a Valentine’s Day about how you, as a speaker can love your audience. So you’re going to hear three ways that you can do so. Before we get into the episode, I wanted to let you know that our spring enrollment for the Thought Leader Academy is open with a March 15th start date. Have you been thinking about joining the Thought Leader Academy or this is your first time hearing about it? I invite you to go to Speaking Your Brand academy again. That’s Speaking Your Brand academy to get all of the details and to submit your application form and our Thought Leader Academy. We help you evolve from an expert presenter to a thought leader by helping you create your thought leadership message and container your signature talk one for your keynote test. I’ll talk in another one for your lead generation signature talk. We also help you with your visibility strategy so you can get more speaking engagements and podcast interviews and your revenue for speaking again and get all the details and submit your application today for our March 15 start date by going to Speaking Your Brand academy. Now let’s get on with the show. Hi there, and welcome to backstage with Speaking Your Brand. I’m Carole Cox, founder and CEO, Speaking Your Brand, and I have with me today Dion Diaz, our lead speaking coach.
Diane Diaz:
Hello, everybody, and
Carol Cox:
We are talking today in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, Valentine’s Day. How to love your audience. We are dressed in red, of course, because we have to be in theme. We have, like all of our little like yes accoutrements to make sure that we are in theme today, and we’re going to talk about how to love our audiences. And the reason where you want to talk about this today, especially, is because the more connected the people in our audiences feel to us and to each other, the more impactful and memorable our presentations of talks will be. And then also, the more value they’ll get, the more learning that they’ll be able to apply to whatever it is. Your topic is. And here’s the thing about loving our audiences. I really see it that it’s about relationship. We’re building relationships with our audiences, and this can mean audiences. You’re developing on your podcast, on your own LinkedIn Live show, so audiences that you’re nurturing over time. It can also be audiences that you only see one time for one speaking engagement, whether it’s virtual or in-person, but you’re still building a relationship with them. And I really see this idea of us as speakers, building relationships as a little bit different than what a lot of people think about with public speaking, which tends to be the focus is on the speaker.
Carol Cox:
Like literally the spotlight is on the speaker and all the value and the information and things that we can provide. But then we forget about us being there and service to our audiences. So I want to really have us focus on that today, and we will be taking your questions and your comments along the way. So if you have questions, we’d also love to hear from you how you love your audiences again, whether it’s virtual presentations or in person. There are ways to do that. All right, Diane, let’s dig into we have three ways that we’re going to share with you today as as far as how you can love your audience. The first one is showing vulnerability. Diane, do you want to talk a little bit about what that means for you as far as showing vulnerability ways that you’ve done that and the ways that you’ve seen some of our clients do it?
Diane Diaz:
Yes. Well, I think one of the first things to keep in mind is that the audience wants you to be open and honest and vulnerable. It’s not unlike if you’re just even if you aren’t speaking. When you have a business, you are serving your customers, serving your clients, and you’re trying to make that, like you said, establish that relationship, right? And so when you’re speaking, I think one of the first things to keep in mind is sharing stories that show your vulnerability. It doesn’t mean that you have to share super deep, dark personal things, but when you share something about yourself, it humanizes you to your audience and they make a stronger connection with you and that they can relate. And then that naturally helps them to take in whatever knowledge or information that you’re sharing with them, or to be inspired by your message because they know you’ve been there. You experience something. You’re human, you’re vulnerable. So I think that’s the first thing to keep in mind, and it can be scary. But the audience wants you to succeed. They want to support you so that when you share stories like that, they’re going to be there for you.
Diane Diaz:
And I know this has come up a lot with our clients. We’ve had clients sometimes say, Well, you know. They might have had a very emotional story to tell, and they think or they say to us, Oh gosh, I’m afraid to tell this story because I’m afraid I might break down, I’m afraid I might cry. I may, I’m afraid I might get emotional, but I always tell them, and I know you do too. That’s OK. It is OK for you to show emotion. There’s nothing wrong with that. And in fact, it’s honesty, right? It’s honesty. It’s vulnerability. It shows your human side. And I think it would be strange if you shared a very personal story and there was absolutely no emotion behind that, right? So I think audiences pick up on that and everybody can identify with that emotional feeling. And so it is OK if the story, you know, becomes a little emotional and makes you emotional while you’re telling it, it’s totally natural and normal, and it’s completely OK and the audience will support you. And in fact, I would say they would probably bond with you even more deeply.
Carol Cox:
Yes, and I’m thinking about this idea of vulnerability and sharing stories and relationship and us again building relationships with our audiences, whether it’s long term relationships or just in that one day that we happen to be speaking with them. And really, relationships are about intimacy. And I don’t mean that kind of intimacy people this Valentine’s Day. But that’s not the kind of intimacy clean. Keep it clean, even a family show. But intimacy is developed. I think about close friendships that you’ve had. I mean, think about when you were in high school and college and then all the way through to the present day. Close friendships develop because you’re willing to share the hard stories and sometimes the hard times with those friends. And so doesn’t mean that everyone in your audience is going to become your BFF. That’s that’s not what you’re doing, and you’re also not using your audience as a therapy session, right? Yeah. Like, there has to be a purpose behind the stories that you’re sharing, drawing and connecting them to the bigger lesson that you’re sharing for the audience’s benefit. But it’s really that the vulnerable stories, those emotional stories is what creates that intimacy. And then that’s what nurtures those relationships. Yes, I love that. That was number one, which is showing vulnerability, and that’s really through stories that you share. And then the second way to love your audience is really to think about what your audience needs in the moment.
Carol Cox:
So obviously, we help our clients create their signature talk. Their keynote talks, their workshops, whatever it is that they’re that they’re doing for their business and for the audiences that they’re speaking to. So they’ll have their content mapped out, their opening story, their closing story, their key points or supporting points or client examples, their third party credibility like we bake it all in. And then sometimes you’ll get to a speaking engagement and you realize that joke that you were going to tell and the opening maybe is not the right moment for that particular joke or the question you were going to ask for your audience. It’s just not the right one or that story you were going to share because every audience no one has its own personality. I know Diane, you have seemed like, well, had the same exact presentation, and we’ve seen this a lot virtually because we with COVID, we that’s all we’ve been doing. You give one presentation to one group and then you give it to a different group, totally different responses. So that will happen. And then sometimes there will be maybe something that went on in the news or something that went on in that particular group. Maybe you’re facilitating a workshop for a company or for an association and something is going on and you have to be mindful to address the needs of the audience in that moment.
Carol Cox:
They may need to share about what’s going on, so you maybe need to throw out a whole section of your fantastic key points and strategies because it’s not going to serve your audience in that moment. They need something different from you. As Diane and I were kind of brainstorming the topics, the points for this LinkedIn Live right now, we thought about two examples for us was back when the pandemic started. Yes, almost two years ago. Now, it’s hard to believe when the pandemic started, we had to make a rapid pivot for the clients we were working with to help them transition their in-person presentations into a virtual version that was going to make it as impactful for their audiences, and also so that they, the clients or clients would feel good about presenting it. So obviously we had to address their needs in the moment, and we couldn’t just pretend that the pandemic didn’t exist and all these speaking events were being cancelled. So we had to face reality with that. And then the second example we came up with was sadly, after George Floyd was killed in May of 2020, we did the podcast episode together. After that called the work of anti-racism as white women.
Carol Cox:
Yeah, it was episode 175 on the Speaking Your Brand podcast. So we did that right away because we really wanted to talk through what, what, what we were feeling and thinking, and how the work that we could do as white women for towards anti-racism. And then the other thing was that we decided to run a book club for our clients using the Book Me and White Supremacy by Layla said. And it was, I think it was six or eight weeks long. We met every single week. It was free. We didn’t charge our clients extra for this. We invited current and past clients to participate with us. They got so much value out of it. They were so appreciative of us doing that because we were serving our audience in the moment with what they needed and frankly, what we needed to write it really was for for their benefit, but also really helped us too. And so when you really think about your role as a speaker and I’ve talked about this a lot on the Speaking Your Brand podcast is that you really are a leader. You’re a role model for your audience. And so you have to kind of be in tune just like any good leader is with their team. Be in tune to your audience. What do they need in the moment? What’s going to facilitate not just them learning whatever it is that’s in your workshop or in your keynote, but what’s really going to serve the needs that they have that’s going to help them take the next step with whatever that may happen to be? All right.
Carol Cox:
And let’s go on to the third way to love your audience. So the first way was to show vulnerability. The second way is to be mindful of what your audience needs in the moment. And now the third thing this one’s fun. And then we’re let. This one is a lot of fun. I share this example in our Thought Leader Academy when we’re delivering the training to our clients on on delivery. So like how to deliver your speech and you know, and do the things on stage and what have you. So the third way to show love to your audience is to let your audience show their love back to you and accept it and accept it. So let your audience show their appreciation and gratitude for you as a speaker. So before I share my specific example of this, let’s let’s kind of do a little scenario here. So, Diane, imagine that I give you a gift for your birthday or for Valentine’s Day, let’s say. And then what would be a way that you would respond to that gift that would not be in a loving manner?
Diane Diaz:
I might say I don’t want this gift that obviously is not very loving or I might just open it and then walk away, which would be very weird.
Carol Cox:
Or maybe you would just hand it back be like, No, thanks. I’m not into this. No, and no. I think most of us had been brought up that like, you accept the gift graciously, even if you already have it, even it’s the ugliest sweater you’ve ever seen, even if it’s not something that you need. You’re just like, Thank you so much and then you regift it. Hopefully, you
Diane Diaz:
Remember after the appropriate amount of time.
Carol Cox:
Right, exactly. So here’s the example I was presenting at a conference. This is about five years ago now in person. So on a stage, and it’s about 100, 120 women in the audience, and my talk was about an hour long, and then we had time after my main content, part of my talk for a separate kind of Q&A, and then we’re working on a workbook that was part of the conference. So I had contributed sections for the workbook. So I delivered my whole talk and I wrapped up with my Indian story and I said, thank you. And the women in the audience started applauding, right? Because they they liked it, which is great. And then and then what I do, I didn’t like receive the applause or the appreciation. I just like hurriedly, like walked over to where the podium was on the side of the stage, grabbed the work bug. I was like, All right, everyone, let’s open to Page 15. Let’s work on the workbook. And like, for me, it was like, Well, like, I just want to get back to the task, right? Right. And then I’m so appreciative. There was a woman in the audience and I didn’t know her before the conference. There was the one from the audience, and she came up to me later the day or the next day and said, Carol, you know, I loved your talk. Super inspiring. There’s just one thing and I’m like, Oh, no, like what? Like what is it? She’s like, Wow, you know, when you finished and everyone was applauding you kind of just like, ran away and I was like, Oh, did I OK? Like, Oh, she’s like, Wow, you didn’t allow your audience to give the gift back of appreciating what you just gave to them. And I was like, Wow, I never thought of it that way. And then I think like, I go to the ballet, I go to see plays, and what do we do at the end? We applaud the performers. And what are the performers?
Diane Diaz:
Do they stand on the stage and take all of it in right?
Carol Cox:
They take their bows. The flowers get thrown on the stage. Imagine if you went to a performance and even like concerts like they come back for an encore. Yeah, go to a performance and the ballet. They just kind of like, leave the stage at the end of the song and they don’t come back and everyone’s applauding. You be like, Yeah, when they don’t, they want this because as the audience like, is an energetic exchange with the audience and the performers and you as a speaker, as the performer, and you are denying the audience that energetic exchange when you just literally like run off the stage. So don’t do that.
Diane Diaz:
Yes, yes. And don’t do that. I think too, from the from the speakers standpoint, sometimes it can feel very awkward to stand there and let people applaud you because we’re not we don’t necessarily consider ourselves to be quote-unquote performers. So it feels very awkward and uncomfortable. But I think if you do it a couple of times and you just stand there for a few minutes and you don’t have to really do much of anything, except you could just smile and nod your head and mouthed, thank you. And that’s sufficient. But I think it just takes practice to get
Carol Cox:
Used to that. It still feels awkward to me. I actually notice now if I’m watching a movie or a TV show and there is someone giving some type of performance and then they’ll stand there and they’ll say their thing, I’m like, Oh my God, I would. I just want to run off. So I’m a work in progress.
Diane Diaz:
Yes. Yeah.
Carol Cox:
All right. So those were our three ways to love your audience. Show vulnerability through stories. Be mindful of what your audience needs in the moment and let your audience show their appreciation and gratitude back to you when you’re done. And really, this is about building that relationship with your audience, thinking about serving your audience and what they need, and having that energetic exchange with them. All right, Diane, thank you so much for joining me on this LinkedIn Live. For those of you watching and listening, if you would like to work together on your thought leadership and your signature talk and on your delivery so that you don’t run off the stage, you are invited to apply for our Thought Leader Academy. Our spring enrollment is open for a March 15th start date. We would love to see your application come through. You submit the application and then we schedule a Zoom call with you to talk through your application, answer any questions you have, and then make sure that the Thought Leader Academy is the best fit for you. You can get all the details and apply by going to Speaking Your Brand academy. Again, that’s Speaking Your Brand academy. We actually have the group that started last October of Twenty Twenty One is getting is graduating February 15th. So tomorrow as of this LinkedIn Live and I have just loved seeing the progress that they’ve made working on those signature talks, putting their thought leadership message out there consistently to their audiences. And I can’t wait to see the the new group of women who join us.
Diane Diaz:
They’re going to be fantastic as always.
Carol Cox:
Yeah. Well, thank you, Diane, for again for joining me today on LinkedIn Live. Thanks, Carol. We do our LinkedIn Live show every other Monday at 2:00 p.m. Eastern Time. Make sure to join us right here on LinkedIn. Thank you.
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265-SYB-Love-Your-Audience.mp3: Audio automatically transcribed by Sonix
265-SYB-Love-Your-Audience.mp3: this mp3 audio file was automatically transcribed by Sonix with the best speech-to-text algorithms. This transcript may contain errors.
Carol Cox:
We’re wrapping up the month of February talking about how you can love your audience as a speaker on this episode of the Speaking Your Brand podcast. More and more women are making an impact by starting businesses running for office and speaking up for what matters. With my background as a TV political analyst, entrepreneur and speaker, I interview and coach purpose driven women to shape their brands, grow their companies and become recognized as influencers in their field. This is Speaking Your Brand, your place to learn how to persuasively communicate your message to your audience. Hi there, and welcome to the Speaking Your Brand podcast. I’m your host, Carol Cox. This episode is the audio from a LinkedIn Live that we did on a Valentine’s Day about how you, as a speaker can love your audience. So you’re going to hear three ways that you can do so. Before we get into the episode, I wanted to let you know that our spring enrollment for the Thought Leader Academy is open with a March 15th start date. Have you been thinking about joining the Thought Leader Academy or this is your first time hearing about it? I invite you to go to Speaking Your Brand academy again. That’s Speaking Your Brand academy to get all of the details and to submit your application form and our Thought Leader Academy. We help you evolve from an expert presenter to a thought leader by helping you create your thought leadership message and container your signature talk one for your keynote test. I’ll talk in another one for your lead generation signature talk. We also help you with your visibility strategy so you can get more speaking engagements and podcast interviews and your revenue for speaking again and get all the details and submit your application today for our March 15 start date by going to Speaking Your Brand academy. Now let’s get on with the show. Hi there, and welcome to backstage with Speaking Your Brand. I’m Carole Cox, founder and CEO, Speaking Your Brand, and I have with me today Dion Diaz, our lead speaking coach.
Diane Diaz:
Hello, everybody, and
Carol Cox:
We are talking today in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, Valentine’s Day. How to love your audience. We are dressed in red, of course, because we have to be in theme. We have, like all of our little like yes accoutrements to make sure that we are in theme today, and we’re going to talk about how to love our audiences. And the reason where you want to talk about this today, especially, is because the more connected the people in our audiences feel to us and to each other, the more impactful and memorable our presentations of talks will be. And then also, the more value they’ll get, the more learning that they’ll be able to apply to whatever it is. Your topic is. And here’s the thing about loving our audiences. I really see it that it’s about relationship. We’re building relationships with our audiences, and this can mean audiences. You’re developing on your podcast, on your own LinkedIn Live show, so audiences that you’re nurturing over time. It can also be audiences that you only see one time for one speaking engagement, whether it’s virtual or in-person, but you’re still building a relationship with them. And I really see this idea of us as speakers, building relationships as a little bit different than what a lot of people think about with public speaking, which tends to be the focus is on the speaker.
Carol Cox:
Like literally the spotlight is on the speaker and all the value and the information and things that we can provide. But then we forget about us being there and service to our audiences. So I want to really have us focus on that today, and we will be taking your questions and your comments along the way. So if you have questions, we’d also love to hear from you how you love your audiences again, whether it’s virtual presentations or in person. There are ways to do that. All right, Diane, let’s dig into we have three ways that we’re going to share with you today as as far as how you can love your audience. The first one is showing vulnerability. Diane, do you want to talk a little bit about what that means for you as far as showing vulnerability ways that you’ve done that and the ways that you’ve seen some of our clients do it?
Diane Diaz:
Yes. Well, I think one of the first things to keep in mind is that the audience wants you to be open and honest and vulnerable. It’s not unlike if you’re just even if you aren’t speaking. When you have a business, you are serving your customers, serving your clients, and you’re trying to make that, like you said, establish that relationship, right? And so when you’re speaking, I think one of the first things to keep in mind is sharing stories that show your vulnerability. It doesn’t mean that you have to share super deep, dark personal things, but when you share something about yourself, it humanizes you to your audience and they make a stronger connection with you and that they can relate. And then that naturally helps them to take in whatever knowledge or information that you’re sharing with them, or to be inspired by your message because they know you’ve been there. You experience something. You’re human, you’re vulnerable. So I think that’s the first thing to keep in mind, and it can be scary. But the audience wants you to succeed. They want to support you so that when you share stories like that, they’re going to be there for you.
Diane Diaz:
And I know this has come up a lot with our clients. We’ve had clients sometimes say, Well, you know. They might have had a very emotional story to tell, and they think or they say to us, Oh gosh, I’m afraid to tell this story because I’m afraid I might break down, I’m afraid I might cry. I may, I’m afraid I might get emotional, but I always tell them, and I know you do too. That’s OK. It is OK for you to show emotion. There’s nothing wrong with that. And in fact, it’s honesty, right? It’s honesty. It’s vulnerability. It shows your human side. And I think it would be strange if you shared a very personal story and there was absolutely no emotion behind that, right? So I think audiences pick up on that and everybody can identify with that emotional feeling. And so it is OK if the story, you know, becomes a little emotional and makes you emotional while you’re telling it, it’s totally natural and normal, and it’s completely OK and the audience will support you. And in fact, I would say they would probably bond with you even more deeply.
Carol Cox:
Yes, and I’m thinking about this idea of vulnerability and sharing stories and relationship and us again building relationships with our audiences, whether it’s long term relationships or just in that one day that we happen to be speaking with them. And really, relationships are about intimacy. And I don’t mean that kind of intimacy people this Valentine’s Day. But that’s not the kind of intimacy clean. Keep it clean, even a family show. But intimacy is developed. I think about close friendships that you’ve had. I mean, think about when you were in high school and college and then all the way through to the present day. Close friendships develop because you’re willing to share the hard stories and sometimes the hard times with those friends. And so doesn’t mean that everyone in your audience is going to become your BFF. That’s that’s not what you’re doing, and you’re also not using your audience as a therapy session, right? Yeah. Like, there has to be a purpose behind the stories that you’re sharing, drawing and connecting them to the bigger lesson that you’re sharing for the audience’s benefit. But it’s really that the vulnerable stories, those emotional stories is what creates that intimacy. And then that’s what nurtures those relationships. Yes, I love that. That was number one, which is showing vulnerability, and that’s really through stories that you share. And then the second way to love your audience is really to think about what your audience needs in the moment.
Carol Cox:
So obviously, we help our clients create their signature talk. Their keynote talks, their workshops, whatever it is that they’re that they’re doing for their business and for the audiences that they’re speaking to. So they’ll have their content mapped out, their opening story, their closing story, their key points or supporting points or client examples, their third party credibility like we bake it all in. And then sometimes you’ll get to a speaking engagement and you realize that joke that you were going to tell and the opening maybe is not the right moment for that particular joke or the question you were going to ask for your audience. It’s just not the right one or that story you were going to share because every audience no one has its own personality. I know Diane, you have seemed like, well, had the same exact presentation, and we’ve seen this a lot virtually because we with COVID, we that’s all we’ve been doing. You give one presentation to one group and then you give it to a different group, totally different responses. So that will happen. And then sometimes there will be maybe something that went on in the news or something that went on in that particular group. Maybe you’re facilitating a workshop for a company or for an association and something is going on and you have to be mindful to address the needs of the audience in that moment.
Carol Cox:
They may need to share about what’s going on, so you maybe need to throw out a whole section of your fantastic key points and strategies because it’s not going to serve your audience in that moment. They need something different from you. As Diane and I were kind of brainstorming the topics, the points for this LinkedIn Live right now, we thought about two examples for us was back when the pandemic started. Yes, almost two years ago. Now, it’s hard to believe when the pandemic started, we had to make a rapid pivot for the clients we were working with to help them transition their in-person presentations into a virtual version that was going to make it as impactful for their audiences, and also so that they, the clients or clients would feel good about presenting it. So obviously we had to address their needs in the moment, and we couldn’t just pretend that the pandemic didn’t exist and all these speaking events were being cancelled. So we had to face reality with that. And then the second example we came up with was sadly, after George Floyd was killed in May of 2020, we did the podcast episode together. After that called the work of anti-racism as white women.
Carol Cox:
Yeah, it was episode 175 on the Speaking Your Brand podcast. So we did that right away because we really wanted to talk through what, what, what we were feeling and thinking, and how the work that we could do as white women for towards anti-racism. And then the other thing was that we decided to run a book club for our clients using the Book Me and White Supremacy by Layla said. And it was, I think it was six or eight weeks long. We met every single week. It was free. We didn’t charge our clients extra for this. We invited current and past clients to participate with us. They got so much value out of it. They were so appreciative of us doing that because we were serving our audience in the moment with what they needed and frankly, what we needed to write it really was for for their benefit, but also really helped us too. And so when you really think about your role as a speaker and I’ve talked about this a lot on the Speaking Your Brand podcast is that you really are a leader. You’re a role model for your audience. And so you have to kind of be in tune just like any good leader is with their team. Be in tune to your audience. What do they need in the moment? What’s going to facilitate not just them learning whatever it is that’s in your workshop or in your keynote, but what’s really going to serve the needs that they have that’s going to help them take the next step with whatever that may happen to be? All right.
Carol Cox:
And let’s go on to the third way to love your audience. So the first way was to show vulnerability. The second way is to be mindful of what your audience needs in the moment. And now the third thing this one’s fun. And then we’re let. This one is a lot of fun. I share this example in our Thought Leader Academy when we’re delivering the training to our clients on on delivery. So like how to deliver your speech and you know, and do the things on stage and what have you. So the third way to show love to your audience is to let your audience show their love back to you and accept it and accept it. So let your audience show their appreciation and gratitude for you as a speaker. So before I share my specific example of this, let’s let’s kind of do a little scenario here. So, Diane, imagine that I give you a gift for your birthday or for Valentine’s Day, let’s say. And then what would be a way that you would respond to that gift that would not be in a loving manner?
Diane Diaz:
I might say I don’t want this gift that obviously is not very loving or I might just open it and then walk away, which would be very weird.
Carol Cox:
Or maybe you would just hand it back be like, No, thanks. I’m not into this. No, and no. I think most of us had been brought up that like, you accept the gift graciously, even if you already have it, even it’s the ugliest sweater you’ve ever seen, even if it’s not something that you need. You’re just like, Thank you so much and then you regift it. Hopefully, you
Diane Diaz:
Remember after the appropriate amount of time.
Carol Cox:
Right, exactly. So here’s the example I was presenting at a conference. This is about five years ago now in person. So on a stage, and it’s about 100, 120 women in the audience, and my talk was about an hour long, and then we had time after my main content, part of my talk for a separate kind of Q&A, and then we’re working on a workbook that was part of the conference. So I had contributed sections for the workbook. So I delivered my whole talk and I wrapped up with my Indian story and I said, thank you. And the women in the audience started applauding, right? Because they they liked it, which is great. And then and then what I do, I didn’t like receive the applause or the appreciation. I just like hurriedly, like walked over to where the podium was on the side of the stage, grabbed the work bug. I was like, All right, everyone, let’s open to Page 15. Let’s work on the workbook. And like, for me, it was like, Well, like, I just want to get back to the task, right? Right. And then I’m so appreciative. There was a woman in the audience and I didn’t know her before the conference. There was the one from the audience, and she came up to me later the day or the next day and said, Carol, you know, I loved your talk. Super inspiring. There’s just one thing and I’m like, Oh, no, like what? Like what is it? She’s like, Wow, you know, when you finished and everyone was applauding you kind of just like, ran away and I was like, Oh, did I OK? Like, Oh, she’s like, Wow, you didn’t allow your audience to give the gift back of appreciating what you just gave to them. And I was like, Wow, I never thought of it that way. And then I think like, I go to the ballet, I go to see plays, and what do we do at the end? We applaud the performers. And what are the performers?
Diane Diaz:
Do they stand on the stage and take all of it in right?
Carol Cox:
They take their bows. The flowers get thrown on the stage. Imagine if you went to a performance and even like concerts like they come back for an encore. Yeah, go to a performance and the ballet. They just kind of like, leave the stage at the end of the song and they don’t come back and everyone’s applauding. You be like, Yeah, when they don’t, they want this because as the audience like, is an energetic exchange with the audience and the performers and you as a speaker, as the performer, and you are denying the audience that energetic exchange when you just literally like run off the stage. So don’t do that.
Diane Diaz:
Yes, yes. And don’t do that. I think too, from the from the speakers standpoint, sometimes it can feel very awkward to stand there and let people applaud you because we’re not we don’t necessarily consider ourselves to be quote-unquote performers. So it feels very awkward and uncomfortable. But I think if you do it a couple of times and you just stand there for a few minutes and you don’t have to really do much of anything, except you could just smile and nod your head and mouthed, thank you. And that’s sufficient. But I think it just takes practice to get
Carol Cox:
Used to that. It still feels awkward to me. I actually notice now if I’m watching a movie or a TV show and there is someone giving some type of performance and then they’ll stand there and they’ll say their thing, I’m like, Oh my God, I would. I just want to run off. So I’m a work in progress.
Diane Diaz:
Yes. Yeah.
Carol Cox:
All right. So those were our three ways to love your audience. Show vulnerability through stories. Be mindful of what your audience needs in the moment and let your audience show their appreciation and gratitude back to you when you’re done. And really, this is about building that relationship with your audience, thinking about serving your audience and what they need, and having that energetic exchange with them. All right, Diane, thank you so much for joining me on this LinkedIn Live. For those of you watching and listening, if you would like to work together on your thought leadership and your signature talk and on your delivery so that you don’t run off the stage, you are invited to apply for our Thought Leader Academy. Our spring enrollment is open for a March 15th start date. We would love to see your application come through. You submit the application and then we schedule a Zoom call with you to talk through your application, answer any questions you have, and then make sure that the Thought Leader Academy is the best fit for you. You can get all the details and apply by going to Speaking Your Brand academy. Again, that’s Speaking Your Brand academy. We actually have the group that started last October of Twenty Twenty One is getting is graduating February 15th. So tomorrow as of this LinkedIn Live and I have just loved seeing the progress that they’ve made working on those signature talks, putting their thought leadership message out there consistently to their audiences. And I can’t wait to see the the new group of women who join us.
Diane Diaz:
They’re going to be fantastic as always.
Carol Cox:
Yeah. Well, thank you, Diane, for again for joining me today on LinkedIn Live. Thanks, Carol. We do our LinkedIn Live show every other Monday at 2:00 p.m. Eastern Time. Make sure to join us right here on LinkedIn. Thank you.
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